Neighbors on Prowl

If there ever was one community of people I have always been apprehensive about, it is the NEIGHBORS.  They come in such shapes and sizes putting the Creator to shame. They can be a blessing in disguise or a pain in the right place. Singles like me are more prone to their misfortunes and blessings.  Handling the neighbor is nothing less than a full time effort which needs lot of backend support. Hence single occupants are always at a loss in ‘mending wall’.

My neighbors so far have never had any problems with me. God fearing individual that I am, I strictly abide by what the bible tells us. It says love thy neighbors and love thy enemies. Little did it know the terms can be used interchangeably.

While my neighbors have been at peace with me, I am afraid I can’t say the same about them. *SIGH* I have had some noteworthy incidents with them.

During my growing up days, my parents were exemplary specimen of social artwork. They made the world look like one huge family and this family cost us kids dear. In the absence of my parents, this extended family voluntarily took to our upkeep and maintenance. One fine day I decided to give them all a run and host my friends for a nocturnal jamboree. I told my friends to sneak in at 11PM when all would be dead. Poor things parked kilometers away and walked those extra miles. No sooner had they laid their hands on the gate my otherwise languid drowsy dog started howling at the top pitch. My poor friends ran as if in a Marathon. Somebody on a nightly chore would have definitely mistaken them for robbers. As for my dog, he had partnered with the community for few bones. Whatever happened to loyalty and faithfulness?

Couple of years back I shifted to Gujarat for my professional commitments. Whoever has been to this part of the world will vouch that Gujratis do not mingle much outside the community. I lived in a Gujrati locality. Prima facie the elderly aunties seemed harmless blessing me with smiles and ‘kemcho’ during evenings. No sooner I experienced what Jane Austen famously said, “Every man is surrounded by a neighborhood of voluntary spies”.  Their smiles were just a façade to fish out events from my life to spice up their daily kitties. One of the old farts was a puffed up, vainglorious, full of herself relic who would invite me purposely for displaying her state of the art facilities.  So skeptical I became of all those aunties that I absolutely stopped bothering about doorbells unless it was the secretly coded pattern of the bell which only my close ones shared.  

I can yap endlessly on the numerous such incidents that have transpired since my childhood and  have all had their share of sorts in making me a recluse that I am today. One of the most important lessons I have learnt while renting out is, “Either do as your neighbors say or move away”.

Well, hold on, my doorbell is ringing. Guess it’s my movers and packers guy. Yup, you got it right….I am moving away. J